What I saw from my house on the hill.
What I saw from my house on the hill,
Really was quite funny.
Lots of little figures walking towards a light,
(It was hard to see as the weather was not
sunny…).
I would not have awoken, if they had been
quiet.
Not quiet, those creatures,
As loud as a riot.
But quite funny with all their odd features:
Green bumpy skin and trumpet-like ears,
Big goggly eyes and toes shaped like tears.
What I saw from my house on the hill
Was quite funny.
But was real scary, after all.
Gabriel, your 100 word challenge is very thrilling! I like the way you set it out. And the use of rhyming was done carefully, for example 'funny' and 'sunny.' The way you described the creatures was very amusing, for example 'Big goggly eyes and toes shaped like tears'. And your use of repetition at the beginning was used perfectly!
ReplyDeleteYour use of the brackets made quite a difference. You could show the reader exactly what you were thinking. You used adventurous vocabulary such as the word 'riot'. Your punctuation was used carefully, you thought about how to use the ellipsis and colons etc. And, the way you ended the story was almost like a mystery; when you wrote 'But was real scary,after all.'
An amazing piece of writing!
Keep it up!